Tod Bolsinger

Ligament Lesson #4: A Memo To Pastors

To my fellow pastors:

If you have been following these series of posts then you probably care as much about the church as I do.  I know that many of the people we pastor don’t get this, but I do:  We are not only committed to Christ, but we truly love Christ’s body.  We are pastors because we love the church.  I am writing this as one of two final installments of this series inspired by the pain I have come to know first hand in five churches, because I believe that we are all pained when one part of the body is suffering.

Let me offer these thoughts to you, my colleagues.

First, we must believe, know and teach the truth.  Our congregations are filled with people who are awash in relativism and the backsplash of overly rigid dogmatism. If our congregations are going to be places where people “speak the truth in love” then we must be custodians of the truth that is found only in Jesus.  We must learn differentiate between “big T” and “little t” truths; between that which is categorically and objectively True that we must hold to with firm conviction even at the cost of unity and those “truths” of our life experiences and perspective that are personally cherished and important for us to share with each other to build trust and intimacy, but not necessarily worthy of division.  Some of the truth is that we polarize around non-essential issues, personalities and preferences.  Let us follow Paul’s example in 1 Cor 7 where even when giving instruction in the sticky matter of sexual ethics Paul could differentiate for his people the difference between “I” and “the Lord”.   

Second, whether we like it or not, our ministry is about both the Word and the People.  Always.  We are not Bible scholars or professors who have the luxury of just studying and teaching the Word, nor are we social workers, politicians or non-profit leaders who only worry about our constituency.  We always serve both.  To paraphrase Eugene Peterson, we must always be in the middle of the mystery of God and the mess of people.  Always.

While the authority and relevance of the Word is certainly under scrutiny, it not attack by the world these days, I believe that the notion of The People is being attacked from within. We Christians have taken in the values of a “divorce culture” and have perpetuated it in the church.  People are unconvinced about, inexperienced in and incompetent at building lasting covenant relationships.  We pastors must teach them another way.  We must work on being good with people and not just “caring” for them, but also creating the environment for people to grow and flourish in faith.  We must learn to humbly lead them in both life-transformation and ministry. And teaching them that to be in Christ is to be in Christ’s body in a local congregation.  That is the Christian way.

By the way, the People part is far more difficult than the Word part, I believe.  Most of us nailed down the World part in seminary, but seminary probably didn’t help us one bit at the people part.  Working with people will also push your own emotional buttons and trigger your own psychological hooks.  Personally I believe pastors should invest at least as much time and money in psycho-therapy, mentoring and supervision as we did in seminary.  (I think I spent more money in therapy than in seminary believe it or not, and I got a Ph.D!)

Third, while you were probably at one time one of the “star players” in your church or a para-church ministry (which is why someone told you to consider going “pro”) as a pastors you are now on the bench.  We are not the “star players” of the church, but the coaches.  We are supposed to be on the sidelines, as it were, instructing, equipping, encouraging and leading a church of “teammates”.  Beware the temptation to take the ball and run with it.

When people come to you to lead a new church, a breakaway or some other split, beware the ‘we need a shepherd’ line.”  More than they need a shepherd they need to be part of the flock.  They need to be part of the body.  In choosing you, they are rejecting each other.  Make them stay and work it out.  Teach them to know the Word, obey Jesus, and forgive and love each other.

And finally, the toughest news for us pastors to remember: If it’s about you, then it’s not about Jesus. This is true in every sermon, every meeting we lead, every decision we make.  My family and I know that all that we enjoy in life is for us to fulfill the calling of leading San Clemente Presbyterian Church.  We often say to each other that we know that the only reason we get to live in San Clemente is because I am the pastor.  If I stop being the pastor, I’d have to leave. 

This is a tough thing to acknowledge for most of us.  We want to have a life, build some job security, sink deep roots and provide for our families.  This is all good.  But remember, you accepted a call to be a pastor.  There are many other ways you could be serving Christ (especially as a lay person).  When you accepted the call to pastor, you became betrothed to the Church.

Minister means servant.  And in the end that is all we do.  We serve Christ, we serve the Word, we serve the People.  Period.

Friends, I believe this is a high calling and great privilege.  As pastors we are part of more holy moments than most.  But our goal is not ourselves but Jesus, seen through His body faithfully living out the gospel in a particular time and place.  That is why we are here. 

Your brother and fellow pastor,

Tod

Memorial Day

Speaking at Laity Lodge

"You have had a fair amount of pain in your life, like everybody else.  You have been a good steward of it."

--Howard Butt, founder of Laity Lodge to Frederick Buechner.

This quote has long been one of my favorites.  Only today did I discover that it came from the wisdom and insight of Howard Butt. Howard Butt's story is one of stewardship and faithfulness that has made a difference in thousands of lives for Christ.

On June 23-26, I will get the great privilege of speaking at H.E. Butt Foundation's Laity Lodge in the hill country outside of San Antonio, Texas. 

The theme of the conference is Show Time: Honest Faith in the Everyday.

I am excited about this opportunity because I will not only get a chance to be part of the great legacy that is the H.E. Butt Foundation and the ministry of the lodge, but I will also get to work alongside musicians Ashley Cleveland and Kenny Greenberg. In addition, Jackie Halstead will also be speaking.

If anyone is interested in joining us at the retreat you can get more information and register here.

John Lennon and the Father's Love

I read this before I headed for the hills and thought I'd leave it behind as a gift on this Friday.  After a lot of discussion about pain in the church it's nice to be reminded of our Father's love for us.

Thank Tim Thompson for this reflection on prayer

I have been reminded of a John Lennon love song that he wrote for his son and recorded on the Double Fantasy album shortly before his death. The first verse of Beautiful Boy goes like this: "Close your eyes, Have no fear, the monster's gone, he's on the run and your daddy's here. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy." Comforting words from a father to his frightened little boy.

And in my own time of prayer, as God teaches me to have faith in Him and rest on His promises; as He seeks to change my heart from one of rebellion and sin to one of surrender and holiness; in those moments where fear may come as I face a holy and righteous God, confronting the monsters in my own life; I can almost hear Him sing those words, "Close your eyes, Have no fear, the monster's gone, he's on the run and your Daddy's here. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy. Darling, darling, darling, darling Tim."

Why I am Not Blogging today...

  Me and my boy are getting two days of sunny-empty-sloped fun at Mammoth.

Will blog again Saturday and be back to church for Sunday.

Hee, hee, hee...

This in from overseas...

Nice review of It Takes a Church here.

Sponsor a Child in Malawi

I don't think that we should be choosing between whether a young girl has immunizations or water, or between whether her mother and father are alive, because they have access of treatment for AIDS, or whether she has a meal at school, or whether her father and mother, who are farmers, are able to grow enough food to feed their family and earn some income. Those all strike me as quite doable and practical things that can be done at once. Jeffrey Sachs, Interview.

If you are looking for a doable and practical way to make a difference in a world of poverty and pain, let me encourage you to consider sponsoring one of the children in our Y-Malawi Partnership with World Vision.

For more information click here.

To understand more about our project in Africa you can read this series of posts.

Bush, Calvin and Community

Our Founders rejected both a radical individualism that makes no room for others, and the dreary collectivism that crushes the individual. They gave us instead a society where individual freedom is anchored in communities. And in this hopeful new century, we have a great goal: to renew this spirit of community and thereby renew the character and compassion of our nation.

President Bush at Calvin College (HT: Brad Hightower)

(Would that it would be so....)

The whole address is here and is worth reading for the Kuyper references alone.

Ligament Lesson #3: “What’s IN it for me?”

So far, we have been addressing some leadership crises in the church by attempting to recover the biblical understanding of both the pastor and laity roles in a congregation.  In the last post I wrote that Ephesians 4 points out that pastors are to be “ligaments” that connect the different parts of the body of Christ together so that the body can grow itself up in the head who is Christ. 

Primarily, pastors do this by equipping the church to “speak the truth in love” to each other and that we need to insure that the body of Christ is clear on “the truth” as the biblically rooted truth of Jesus given to us in the Scriptures by the Holy Spirit.  I believe that contrary to popular wisdom, conflict is more likely in places where there is not an agreed-upon conviction of what is true.  The more relative we think truth is, the more we must rely upon power and politics to get our way. 

But it is also important to note that in the churches that I am referring to, I have picked up no crisis with “the” truth.  These pastors were not heretics.  As I said before, there was no theological crisis, no biblical division nor any social issue driving the people into factions (which, by the way, is the opposite of much what Derek is chagrined about in denominational splits in an earlier comment).  The people were not being led astray.  They were just ignorant and immature about their awareness and practice of what it means to be the body of Christ and they were not equipped in the crucial art of “speaking the truth in love.” 

So, what does it mean to “speak the truth in love”? 

The key word here is actually not “truth” or “love.”  It is in.  For Paul, in is a big word.  To be in Christ is to have salvation.  To be in Christ is to be “in relationship with Christ.”  So, the best understanding of “speaking the truth in love” is “speaking the truth in relationships of love”.  That is speaking the truth that is anchored in Christ, in relationships that reflect the love of Christ.

And this is where so often the church begins to fall apart.  If we are going to “grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ” (v. 15) then we must be better at knowing and speaking the truth in relationships of love. 

And this is not optional.  It is not a suggestion.  The more deeply we are related to each other, the more necessary it is that we speak the truth to each other.  The more difficult it is to speak the truth, the more we must build the relationships.  As I tell my staff, “If you have a relationship, speak the truth.  If you can’t speak the truth, build the relationship.”

In my opinion, in some of the cases, the pastors exacerbated the conflict in the church by the way they handled the criticism and concerns of some disaffected people in the church.  In other cases, it seems that some of the pastors did not have strong enough relationships with leaders and members of their churches to both speak and heart the truth being spoken to them. 

But let me be clear here.  I don’t believe that in the five congregations that I have observed that the pastors were solely to blame. It does take two to tango. But I do believe that the pastors were to some significant degree responsible for what happened. 

It is the pastor’s responsibility to equip the saints, to strengthen the body and to lead the church in learning how to speak the truth in love to each other.  From my limited vantage point, both a number (not all) of the pastors and most (if not all) of the churches failed to understand—at least—the second half of Paul’s admonition to “speak the truth in love.”

So, what, then should we do?  That'll be the next post.

Ligament Lesson #2: "Speaking the Truth"

We have been in the middle of a series stemming from church split and division in five congregations where I have friends involved.  The last couple of posts I have been trying to outline a biblical understanding of church and especially pastoral leadership by looking at Ephesians chapter. 4.

So far from this chapter we have learned that God we have learned that pastors and other church leaders are “gifts” from God to the body to equip the body to live a life worthy of its calling, by living in unity and growing in maturity.  Church leaders are the “ligaments” of the body that provide stability and flexibility while holding the members together so that the body can build itself up in love.  And that church leaders function as “ligaments” by “speaking the truth in love”.   

As I wrote in the last post, “speaking the truth in love” is the primary call of the pastor.  We pastors are to teach the body how to “speak the truth in love” so we can “grow up in every way” into Christ who is the head of the body.  As we speak the truth in love the body grows stronger, more unified, works properly, promotes growth within itself and builds “itself” up.  So, what does “speaking the truth in love” mean? 

Last post I told you what I think it doesn’t mean, and most specifically it doesn’t pit love and truth against each other.  Nor does it mean what most people think, which is “to speak the truth I have found nicely” (Emphasis here both on “my” truth and on being “nice”). 

In his book The Closing of the American Mind, Harold Bloom wrote that for a generation now Americans have become so mired in the value of “openness” that we now can’t express any conviction of truth.  We see the mistakes of the past based on dogmatic and wrong-headed expressions of xenophobia, racism, chauvinism and the like and we declare that the only way to live is not to think that we are right or can grasp the truth, but that there really is no truth.  And since there really is no truth all that matters is getting along with myriads of people who can’t agree on anything important.

What Bloom reveals is that in the absence of genuine differences and distinctions we don’t have the opportunity to demonstrate respect, humility and conviction, but instead the prevailing ethic of the day is to be “nice.”

In many ways, I believe that both the relativism of our culture and “ethic of niceness” have become so prevalent in the church that we have lost the ability to “speak the truth in love” to each other. 

We become mired in insecurity and passivity. We feel the effects of a vacuum of shared convictions and deep relationships.

Often that vacuum is then filled by strong leaders whose personality becomes the mediator of “truth” to a congregation that is unable to evaluate, correct or confront with biblical truth in required love. Before long the pastor becomes the “head” of the church and not the “ligament” and the unity and strength of the church is measured by adherence and loyalty to the pastor and not to the truth of the head, Christ. 

This is especially dangerous in churches where the pastor is more dynamic, charismatic and perceived as being clearly trustworthy in his or her proclamation of the truth. Even pastors who are personally faithful to the truth of the gospel, if they do not equip the body to know the truth, can lead the body becomes overly dependent on the pastor and the church can divide over the pastor.

While this problem was evident even in the first century, it is exactly the opposite of the New Testament commendation of church leadership.  In Ephesians 4 “speaking the truth in love” is not a vague admonition but a very specific exhortation to speak the truth of the gospel (v. 4-5) so that the body will “grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ” (v. 15) and “no longer be children, tossed to and fro and blown about by every wind of doctrine, by people’s trickery, by their craftiness in deceitful scheming (v. 14).  (Notice also that the truth here is not “my” truth, but instead an adherence to what is agreed upon as “the” truth.) 

In the New Testament, Paul is not lauded for his dynamism or charisma (in fact he must defend himself from charges that he is not a strong enough leader—see 2 Cor 11:5-6).  Instead he insists that his ministry should be measured by its adherence to the truth of God (Galatians 1:6-9, Acts 17:11). 

In short, the first job of pastors is to insure that the body knows the truth of the head, Christ and will therefore be able to confront any other teacher or leader who brings different doctrine or manipulation through personal charisma. 

But, notice also that “the truth” does not lead to a stagnant, rigid body that is so mired in “holding fast” and “holding on” that it is unable to flex or move.  Instead like a healthy body that is functioning properly, the muscles and bones have “strength” “alignment” and full “range of motion” to be able perform almost without thinking.  When pastors have equipped the body with the truth of the head, then the body is more free to move, adapt, correct, respond and extend itself.  When the body is aligned in the truth of the gospel it is freer to function well, almost effortlessly with every nerve and muscle receiving instantaneous messages from the head and moving with ease and grace. 

But for the body to function effectively and grow healthy it takes more than just a commitment to the truth, the truth needs to be communicated “in love” and that so often misunderstood phrase (and the wisdom, discernment and maturity that it requires, and the need for pastors to equip the body in it) will be our focus tomorrow. 

Indeed, understanding the “in love” part may be even more important than the “the truth” part in many of our churches.