It Takes A Church...

The Best Investment Possible

Back before we even had kids, we had a friend who told us that she and her husband made a commitment to homeschool their children for one year when each child reached the 6th grade.  She told us about the advantages of having your pre-teen so bonded and connected to you as parents before they entered the teenage years, and of the creativity and fun you can have because the curriculum never really fills a whole day of work.  She warned us that it would be quite an investment of time and resources, but assured us that it would be worth it.

Beth and I decided then and there that when we had a family, we would do the same.  Later as our kids got closer to the sixth grade we also decided that during the year, each of our two kids would go on a mission trip with one of us, as well as take another educational trip with the other parent. It has been an investment indeed.

Beth put her career as marriage and family therapist on hold to be able to teach them.  We rearranged our lives and saved our pennies for the trips we would take (especially this year with the economy such as it is.) 

But the connection and time and experiences we have had with our kids are already demonstrating the immeasurable value of this commitment. 

When our son Brooks was in the 6th grade (he is now a sophomore), he saw the American historical sites of the east coast with his mother and then went to Malawi with me on the "set-up" trip for the whole Y-Malawi ministry.  Those who have followed this blog for awhile might remember the series of posts that I wrote about the experience and how it changed both my and my son's life.  When he returned to public school the following year, he arranged the first student-led Bible study at the Junior High and has been a leader in our youth group.  Tuesday he joined a bunch of our church members and kids to feed Thanksgiving dinner to a Marine Regiment.  If you see his Facebook page, you'll know that he loves Jesus, he is a "friend" of the Senior VP of World Vision, and has a passion for seeing the world "put to rights" as only God can do. 

Now our daughter, Ali is in the 6th grade and recently returned from a trip to South Africa to visit Acres of Love (a ministry that provides homes for children orphaned by AIDS), with a stop in Paris on the way to see some art and history. And once again, we have witnessed an amazing burst of growth in compassion, perspective and sensitivity in our child.  She was guided and mentored by a young woman who grew up in our church and now works with Acres of Love in Johannesburg.  Ali spent so much time with children whose lives have been tragically altered only to experience the grace of being truly "saved" by Christian people who love them dearly.  She and her mom spent a day touring Soweto and learning of the massacre in a church and the uprisings that took place because of Apartheid.  She saw the boyhood homes of Nelson Mandela and Desmond Tutu and she hugged a lot of children.

Ali returned from South Africa, made a PowerPoint presentation and was offered the opportunity to speak at our church for two different groups.  When a World Vision gift catalog appeared at our house telling of how $200 could buy a goat and ten chickens for a family in Africa, Ali decided that she had the time to do so as a homeschooler, so she committed to doing a yard sale at our house and running/walking the Turkey Trot 10K. 

She sent out word to our family and friends, I put some information up on Facebook and she held the yard sale.  And then yesterday, in the pouring rain trudged the 6.2 miles to make a small difference in the world.  Beth told me that she and Ali spent the whole walk/run talking about how many eggs could be produced for families because they were out in the rain.

Yesterday Ali added up the total she had raised just from some give away items and generous friends and today she'll "go shopping" on the Y-Malawi and World Vision website so that animals that will sustain people will be sent to Africa, including the Nkhoma Area Development Project that her big brother had helped establish four years earlier. 

As I said, she hoped to be able to raise $200 to buy a goat and ten chickens, as of last night, she had raised $1000.

Now the list looks like this:

2 goats
10 chickens
20 fruit trees
1 cow
1 sheep

It sounds like one of those commercials doesn't it?
Traveling to Africa, rearranging your family life, the time to teach your kids at home, putting career aspirations on hold:  Pretty darn expensive.

Seeing your kids become leaders in making a difference in the world: So priceless that you can't type the words without tears in your eyes. 

(Here is something you and your family can watch and here is something you can do this Advent, if you'd like to take a small step now.  And if you'd like to follow further adventures of my daughter's year and what she is learning and seeing, click here.)

Wisdom, Creation, Happiness

While I was on vacation soaking in the majesty of the Alaska wilderness, my congregation was learning together the wisdom of Proverbs.  This week I return to church and will speak next Sunday on Proverbs. In my early morning reflections while on vacation, I found myself reminded once again of the connection in the Scriptures between Wisdom, Creation and the happiness in life that we all want to enjoy and pass on to our families. So, I offer this pictorial representation of one section of the book of Proverbs, wisdom personified reminds us that she offers us a perspective on life that comes from the beginning of time, and offers us words to live by...

The Lord created me at the beginning of his work,
the first of his acts of long ago.
Ages ago I was set up,
at the first, before the beginning of the earth.
When there were no depths I was brought forth,
when there were no springs abounding with water.



Before the mountains had been shaped,
before the hills, I was brought forth—
when he had not yet made earth and fields,
or the world’s first bits of soil.



When he established the heavens, I was there,
when he drew a circle on the face of the deep,
when he made firm the skies above,
when he established the fountains of the deep,

when he assigned to the sea its limit,
so that the waters might not transgress his command,
when he marked out the foundations of the earth,
then I was beside him, like a master worker
and I was daily his delight,
rejoicing before him always,



rejoicing in his inhabited world
and delighting in the human race….



“And now, my children, listen to me:
happy are those who keep my ways.
Hear instruction and be wise,
and do not neglect it.
Happy is the one who listens to me..."

(Proverbs 8:22-34)

Essentials for the Alaskan "Mommy and Me" Walking Club

(Do you see the rifle?  It is Grizzly bear country.)

A Final Gift

Everyone who comes to Alaska is told numerous times by the locals that most tourists "never" see Mt. McKinley (or Denali as the locals call it), the tallest mountain in North America.  The oft-quoted statistic is that the mountain is only "out" 20% of the time.  When we called up here before our trip we were warned that this had been the "worst summer" weather-wise in history.  So, we came prepared: Rain gear in tow, attitudes in check, ready to enjoy the "wild" of Alaska, if not all the beauty. 

Over and over again, we were delightfully, deliriously surprised.  The weather was way better than predicted.  The rain mostly held off and we made do with cloud filled days that were good for fishing, fine for hiking and as good as we could hope for sight seeing. 

The fishing turned out to be epic. The hiking was great.  And the sight-seeing? Awesome at every turn.  Abundant animals, beautiful scenes of mountains and skies filled with clouds that were interesting if not pristinely clear. We were thrilled, we even got glimpses of the base of Denali while in the park.  All in all, nothing to be disappointed in at all.

And then we got this...

In an earlier post I said that all I wanted was a safe encounter with a grizzly bear and glimpse of Denali.  Oh, the bliss when all expectations are exceeded. It is grace indeed.

Better than X Box...Revisited.

A couple of years back after one of our family adventures, I started a series of posts that I called "Better than X Box and Umbrella Drinks".  It became a small seminar that Beth and I taught at our church about how to use adventure vacationing to teach your kids your values and bond them to you.

We were inspired to do so after I returned to church following one vacation and threw in some pictures from Yellowstone National Park in my sermon to enhance an illustration.  A mom came up to Beth and said, "Your kids saw buffalo!? And to think that I took my kids to a hotel where they played video games and while I had umbrella drinks by the pool. Next year I am doing your kind of vacation."

This young mom had had the same "aha!" experience that I had one day, when in a small group, I asked a man with grown daughters some parenting advice.  I noticed that his two daughters and their husbands loved being with him and his wife.  That this family seemed to have an uncommon bond even as adults.  I asked him what he had done when raising his kids that had led to  these rare and so satisfying relationships with his now grown children.  He answered with one word, "Camping."  Then he explained, "When times were tough, we could take the camper down to the beach and make a fire and block out the world.  When times were good, we could load up the camper and head down the road and keep our focus on what really matters.  I think camping was the best thing we ever did." 

That next summer when Brooks was six and Ali was two we took our first RV vacation to Yellowstone.

Of all the things we have learned as parents, our "adventure vacations" have been the most satisfying lessons.  As another amazing two weeks "off the grid" (so to speak) hiking, fishing, seeing beautiful places and wild animals comes to an end, I can feel my soul being refreshed and the hearts of my wife and our kids being more closely knit together.

Our evening prayers are always filled with gratitude.  The sense of wonder at the immensity of God's creation and the artistry of the Creator have flooded our senses.  Bears, beluga whales, moose, caribou, bald eagles, rainbow trout, salmon, marmots, dall sheep, mountain goats.  Thick forests, calving glaciers, cold rivers, bright sunshine, thrusting mountains, ranging valleys.  Fishing, flying, boating, hiking, skiing, napping, reading, driving, singing, laughing. Eating pie.

As our kids enter the teen years we are more and more grateful for every minute we have with them. And the catalog of memories literally span the globe.  We have been blessed with the resources (and have made a priority) traveling to beautiful semi-wild and somewhat wild places.  But the distance traveled is not the issue, but the decision to unplug, unwind, and get outside into God's world together.  When the kids were younger we RV'd to national parks.  This time we rented a cabin with another family, we have found a few favorite places to which we are drawn to return and exploring may soon give way to a special spot. There is no right way to do these kinds of vacations, but the common themes are family, nature, adventure, laughter...and pie.

Recently, I talked to another older man about the sadness I feel that my kids are growing up so fast.  Frankly, I have more adventures in my mind than summers left on the calendar before Brooks goes off to college.  This man said to me, "Tod, if you do your job as parent well, you'll get twice as many years with your kids as adult friends. And that is when it is really fun."

So, with thanks to Scott McOwen and Jim Ritchie and all the others wise souls who have encouraged this pastor to unplug for his family's sake. And with gratitude to God the Great Creator who gives us this big beautiful world in which to "go outside and play", here are a few more pictures, a couple of book suggestions, and a gentle nudge to consider how some intentional decisions about vacations could be the most powerful investment in your kids lives and your family relationships for years to come. (Facebook friends can see the whole album over at my FB profile page.)

Tasting Grace...once again...

“People need wild places.  Whether or not we think we do, we do.  We need to be able to taste grace and know once again that we desire it.  We need to experience a landscape that is timeless, whose agenda moves at the pace of speciation and glaciers.  To be surrounded by a singing, mating, howling commotion of other species, all of which love their lives as much as we do, and none of which could possibly care less about our economic status or our running daily calendar.  Wilderness puts us in our place.  It reminds us that our plans are small and somewhat absurd.  It reminds us why, in those cases in which our plans might influence future generations we ought to choose carefully.  Looking out on a clean plank of planet earth, we can get shaken right down to the bone by the bronze-eyed possibility of lives that are not our own.” 

(Barbara Kingsolver, cited in Brady and Neuzil, A Spiritual Field Guide: Meditations for the Outdoors, 143.)

"My soul basks in wilderness, and I am grateful."

(More pictures of our Alaskan Adventure at my Facebook site.)

Consider this my excuse...

While a bunch of my colleagues are with the good people at the Presbyterian Global Fellowship Conference in Long Beach, I had to turn down the invitation to be part of the conference because I already had plans with my family to go to Alaska.

I am sorry to miss the good conference, but frankly, I wouldn't have missed this moment for anything.

Or the look on my son's face when he hooked into this next fish...

(With thanks to Stacy Corbin of Mystic Waters Fly Fishing Guides in Cooper Landing, Alaska)

For the Next Couple of Weeks...

May not have internet service, may not want to post...may decide to brag about big trout...don't really know.  Except that I am heading to Alaska with my fly rod and family and can't wait to get there...

Tasting Grace

“People need wild places.  Whether or not we think we do, we do.  We need to be able to taste grace and know once again that we desire it.  We need to experience a landscape that is timeless, whose agenda moves at the pace of speciation and glaciers.  To be surrounded by a singing, mating, howling commotion of other species, all of which love their lives as much as we do, and none of which could possibly care less about our economic status or our running daily calendar.  Wilderness puts us in our place.  It reminds us that our plans are small and somewhat absurd.  It reminds us why, in those cases in which our plans might influence future generations we ought to choose carefully.  Looking out on a clean plank of planet earth, we can get shaken right down to the bone by the bronze-eyed possibility of lives that are not our own.” 

(Barbara Kingsolver, cited in Brady and Neuzil, A Spiritual Field Guide: Meditations for the Outdoors, 143.)

“We need to be able to taste grace and know once again that we desire it.”

Tasting Grace…
•    My daughter so excited about our RV trip that she made me sleep out in the RV with her, the night before we left home.

•    Seeing my children with their grandmother and great-grandmother all together.  Four generations all in one place telling stories together.

•    Get up early with Charlie to do another half-ironman even though we haven’t trained nearly enough this past year.

•    Riding my bike through 50 miles of vineyards lined with coastal redwoods.

•    Running 13 miles with a new friend who is my age and doing a half-Ironman to celebrate surviving a heart attack.

•    Sipping cocktails in front of our RV with friends both old and new while the kids play track ball on a meadow.

•    Driving up Highway 1 with my family, listening to hymns with tears in my eyes as I take in the beauty of the landscape. 

•    Searching for sea glass and old shells on a windswept beach.

•    Looking for geocaches with my kids, a GPS scavenger that led us to see sea lions, unworn trails and silly treasure that was more fun than gold.

•    Seeing deer in the morning, huge Roosevelt Elk on the side of the road.

•    Swimming in three different rivers.

•    Finding wild blackberries and making a huge dutch-oven cobbler.

•    Finding two huge jump rocks (20-30 feet?) and watching the kids leap off the top scared, thrilled and proud as the splashed into the gin-clear water.

•    Walking through a grove of old-growth redwoods that made a soaring cathedral all around us and a soft path under our feet.

•    Driving beautiful roads and exploring, brand new territory in my home state.

•    Exploring the Oregon Caves, 250 feet under ground.

•    Camping in beautiful places, eating good, hearty meals cooked over an open fire and playing games, singing songs, telling stories and looking at stars until late in the night with our best friends.

•    Dutch-oven cinnamon rolls.

•    Campfire lattes made in the early morning over a campfire.

•    Fishing with Brooks on Manzanita Lake as the sun goes down.

•    Exploring Sequoia Trees and looking for bears with Beth and Ali.

•    Not one email in almost two weeks…

“We need to be able to taste grace and know once again that we desire it.”